Hopefully he doesn't keep his anaconda in his office. However, conducting morning workouts, which consist solely of side bends and sit-ups, in his office is okay with me.

Wake me when he kills a boar with a book.

As much as I wanted to do that, I think the best option nowadays is to use a Raspberry Pi or some other tiny board. (At least that's what I'm going to do.) That is, unless you have everything on hand.

Thanks to the insane amount of driving I'm doing (it's already over 171,000 miles) it might not have much value. But that is the plan. As far as I know, I would be able to get more value trying to sell it down near my wife, though.

(1) Because it was the only job available in my field, really. I used to work at a paper that was much closer, but leaving wasn't really my decision.

Starting, of course, with the grape jelly doughnuts.

"Question is" or "questions are". Choose one. CAPTAIN GRAMMAR TO THE RESCUE!

Okay, now take your situation and (a) knock about $100 off of each of those checks (b) dump the PT job, because your FT job schedule is all over the place and won't allow for a PT job (c) dump the apartment, because you can't afford rent in your overpriced state and have to live with your parents 40 miles away (d)…

How about if you bought a new car because it was all you could afford? I have the car I'm driving now because my old car was on its last legs and between the trade-in value and my tax payment, I had enough for a down payment on a new car (or an unreliable used car, which in my line of work isn't going to cut it). Once…

No, but being an overpaid yuppie helps you actually save money, as opposed to scraping by because you are, quite literally, making only slightly more than it takes to cover expenses (mandatory expenses, too, because you've already cut everything else to the bone). I'd get into it further, but you're just going to…

You can't help yourself from fallin'.

Thanks, but did they make it any bigger? 1280x1024 is only suitable for my work desktop. :(

Every 20-30 minutes at home. I forget how often. At work, I just changed it to the K9 one chasing the Doctor Who villains on the desktop. Before that, I had the New Orleans Pelicans logo, and I changed it to that the day they announced the new logo, colors, etc. The work-issued notebook was just some simple black…

Aww, I figured it was something about Adventure Time. "Dog lover" was the dead giveaway, though, that you own the real-life Jake. It's okay. You can admit it.

How much does the awesome hat enhance productivity?

Which is a stupid thing to fake, because American Pickers already pisses off enough people as it is. (I interviewed one of the cast members for a story not long before the show premiered.) I suppose manufacturing that kind of drama is standard reality show operating procedure, though, because that's more controllable…

+more nuts than Delta Airlines

June Jones would've started him at WR. It woulda worked, too.

Jared Lorenzen's only 31. He can still suit up and hand off to Fangupo. They'd eat defenses ALIVE.