Have you tried the banana yet? You mustn't poo-poo the idea. Every little bit helps.

See, it's anger like that, that's causing your symptoms.

Reminds me of the guy who showed off his prince albert at parties. That got old real quick.

You mean arrested development.

That's ok. I share a kale smoothie with my roommate when I have a migraine. Preferably gluten free kale, but if it's a really bad migraine, I'll try any kale! know what I mean? lol

Yes, of course. I'm a dermatologist. Take a cotton ball and apply warm water to the area. Wait 5 minutes and wrap the area in soft gauze. In 24 hours, shove a banana in your ass and repeat the phrase "Zim zala-Bar zala Doo-zan" 6 times while facing each cardinal direction. Symptoms should clear up within 4-6…

You do realize your body's metabolism is literally chemistry by another name, don't you? How the fuck do you think you function? Magic? You may think your soul is keeping you alive, but it's actually organic chemistry.

Yes, of course. We wouldn't want to discourage others from self diagnosing and self-medicating their perceived inflictions. Because that sort of folk medicinal remedy make total sense in the 21st century with science based medicine. But than again, facts are completely negotiable because everyone's opinions are…

That's why I go to the doctor.

You've claridied your position so that comparison fell flat. Interestingly, I've read many nuns aren't virgins, that's they entered the convent with some experience, as have many priests.

;-)

I don't think they understand how Twitter works. You have to put that paper into a carrier, and send it through the tubes.

This reminds me of a serving job I had back in college. I was working memorial day weekend at a golden corral. I had just finished refilling the chocolate fountain when I heard a commotion over by the 6 topper by the bathrooms. A tourist had grabbed the arm of a waitress as she was walking by with a full tray,…

I'm sure we're hearing the whole story here...

Of course not. You'd be surprised how many one night stands can begin with fake names and end with false phone numbers. At least there's facebook for me to monitor the pregnancy and shameful birth of my son.

Yes, specifically the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania.

I have the same buzz about being a father. I impregnate women as often as possible.

Listen, sweetheart, don't let one asshole ruin it for you. We're not all like him. Tell him no next time, and if he doesn't listen, tear his fucking sack off.

I find it heartening to see so much support for a pedophile. This is why I have hope that someday all pedophiles will be celebrated and respected, like Michael Jackson. It's time we stop judging people.

indeed. May that pedophiles rest in peace.