Imagine if guys like you ever held Elon Musk to the barest bit of accountability. The Boring Company's site still says this tunnel is going to feature electric skates travelling 100-150mph but you, uh, investors? still want to deflect for your lord and savior. He's moving the goal posts, why don't you care at all…

Great story, Alanis, glad you made it through to tell it. That sounds like a whole lot of fuckery, and the organizers look hella disorganized. I wish you secretly understood Chinese so you could say exactly what the hell was going on, and if they really were gaslighting the fuck out of you guys like they seeemed to be.

The fakers out there would kill to seem this genuine. This is hard to fake.

Mason Plumlee will be the next NBA player to hit the Shammgod 

Weak

Oh, for fucks sake. Who cares. It’s the natural way to hold phones. It’s how you’ll be holding it when you click watch. It’s not the Godfather, its a cellphone video.

you can get infinitely more performance and safety and tech and everything from a newer car, often for a lot less money

That recent dude proposed MID-marathon. Even worse than at the end.

You toek the funny part out of the joke in order to make it a true but humorless sentence. Are you proud of yourself? 

So much better. The new Jeep Gladiator is fucking ugly

This is a classic Friday news dump, one where you've put all your bad takes in one place because it's the weekend and nobody has time to address them. Happy weekend! 

I’m sure you *think* you know where the torque is being applied.

No, the car is fine. I’m laughing at the idea that it’s his prudence keeping himself out of trouble, and not the fact that a V6 Mustang of that era is not going to be a handful in far less careful hands, either, since it makes less horsepower than today’s 4-cylinder Camry does. I, along with a lot of other people, had…

lol wait 1999 V6 Mustang? What power under the hood?? How do you manage to keep those 190 horses in check?

God damn you need to be blocked and reported

I’d buy a coffee shop book of sensually-shot exhaust manifolds. This shit is PURDY

You mean USB-A. USB 2.0 hasn't been the standard for like a decade. 

You know, “vaunted” has the connotation of being bragged about in excess of it being deserved, so it’s a perfect word for the Knicks (actually).

How fast were you going on the highway? The highway ratings are at an average speed of 48mph and a top speed of 60, sooo

Yeah, I never said it was anything like the other, just that it looks like it.