When I was 13 I used to have to melt the skin off my own hand with a blowtorch, take a picture on film and get it developed at the drugstore, and then mail copies to all my friends.

My 13 year old daughter does special fx! She’s attending a camp for it next week and I’m really excited. She’s self-taught so far so it’ll be interesting to see how/if she changes technique with instruction. Here’s her latest:

Personally, I don’t enjoy gore or horror, but I do appreciate special effects makeup and the work and thought that goes into that type of makeup..

I will never have to suffer under the weight of sobriety ever again.

srsly. If you give me a choice between: a) an Uber/Lyft with a car that smells like weed and a driver who talks too much; or b) a driverless car, I’m taking the driverless car.

Cannot be worse than some of the taxi and Uber drivers I had recently. At least a robot car will know where it is supposed to go.

Unless I do sexy time with the wife differently than most, my dick isn’t in her view too often (short of oral and of course my mating dance), so I’d say my mom has seen my wiener a lot more than my wife has, or likely ever will.

...I just called my gf to make sure she wasn’t a Deaspin reader when I didn’t know. You just described our relationship in re: tickling to perfection.

Counterpoint: Raspberries are so delicious nature literally tries to prevent you from eating them with thorns and shit.

“Two to three years of regular sexual contact with your wife is probably enough to close the gap with your mom.” -Drew Magary.

And also the nice absence of pressure to commit. When you’re dating in your 30s with other people in their 30s, there’s the pressure to get serious and get married. When you date someone who is very young, you know they’re not going to be thinking about those things.

Bullshit, it was those individual ones who affected me most, two of them far more than either of my parents. Again your sweeping statement is patently false.

This argument is complete bullshit. No, “we” don’t all know that it’s different for an older woman/younger man. Furthermore, on your “10 years isn’t shit” remark, the age difference itself isn’t the crux of the issue. It’s at what age the relationship began for the younger person in the equation. It’s also about…

A lot of people would call that grooming.

we all know it’s different for an older woman and younger man.

I’m the mother of two boys. If they’re in high school and a teacher propositions them and I find out I’m going straight to the police. It’s not just about the age difference. There’s also a real power imbalance.

Knowing his father I wouldn’t put it past Khaled to have been under the water holding him up.

Tangent, sorry, but I was bummed when I watched DJ Kahled’s video for The One the other day. It was all busty bikini babes with bouncing boobs partying around fully clothed men (and Justin Bieber.) I don’t know why, but I just feel so disappointed, probably because I thought DJ Khaled was above that sort of thing.

Yeah, but don’t forget, like, 3 or 4 Republican congressmen will call it concerning but want to withhold judgement until there’s more information, so there’s that. . .

The statement completes with the completely nonsensical “and came to the U.S. so he could ‘keep the toil of his labor.’”