That is the thing though, it was declared illegal by legitimate authorities. One person cannot decide what is and isn’t legitimate, that is done by society. No matter your beliefs, that fact does not change.

So, I get a book delivered to my house with the weed in it? Is that how it works?

I was buying drugs off of silk road for a few years. I stopped using it once they opened the Armory. Which....why?????

Get infected with ransomeware. It comes with step-by-step directions.

To get bitcoin, for any reason, just sign up for one of the exchanges. Like Kraken, Coinbase or Gdax (not comprehensive list at all) and go through the process to verify your identity and information. This can take anywhere from a few days to a few weeks. Once done, you can buy coins like BTC, ETH or whatever that…

I met the guy who whacked my business partner at book club.

Why are you here? What is the point of you?

Ranch dressing is devil’s ejaculate. Your meat takes are fine, not everyone likes meat, but your veggie/ranch take should see itself out of here.

“What sport are butts most important in?”

Man, I just disagree. French fries. Pretzels. Mashed Potatoes. Sweet Potatoes. Refried beans. Baked beans. Falafel. Hummus. Cole Slaw. Fried potatoes. Spanish rice. pesto sauce. tomato sauce. Salsa. Calabacitas. Fried green tomatoes. Asian pears. Watermelon. Guacamole. The list just goes on and on.

I participated in a really long bicycle ride (once), and to combat the loss of sodium due to sweat (which makes actually “digesting” the water you’ve been drinking, uh.... difficult) I observed other riders drinking pickle juice like it was an ice cold beer.

The obvious answer is that the best pickled foods is that mix of jalapeños, carrots and red onions found at any self respecting taco place, legal and otherwise, around LA. After that, list the rest how you like.

Since 45 minutes have passed and you assholes are all obsessed with pickles ... fuck Penn State.

Multiple shots of peppermint schnapps convinced me that wearing a paper bag over my head all night, at a hotel party, would be the way to win the affection of this girl I found attractive.

This is the rare Deadspin comment that needs several more paragraphs of explanation.

Typical PC culture can’t handle the truth

Nothin worse than a salty car taint

Are you homeless and/or Jim Tomusula? Who the fuck brings a cup of soup to a bar?

It’s also necessary in the south, especially during the summer. Just not for your car. Salt and shit also applies.

Oh come on, nobody believes you’ve got friends.