The other day I was telling my boyfriend that Bernie Sanders rubbed me the wrong way and he asked why and I said he had a tendency to act a little blame-y when he hasn’t won a state but couldn’t draw on any comparisons concretely. But this is exactly what I was trying to explain. If he wins, it’s a win, and it’s all…

His eyelids make him look like a taxidermied chimp. Like, how many brow lifts do you need to buy to achieve that? Do you get a punch card?

Or better yet, “I’m not mean, I’m just honest.” No, nope, you’re actually just mean.

So many quick cuts, I noticed them too almost always seemed to be cutting Logan off or starting her from where she actually was playing the game.

Jonathen Franzen was on the night before and donated to some bird conservancy. Like, this is how you wield your power? You could’ve donated anywhere and you picked birds?

I mean, if his chick is eating at least 30 bananas a day, he’d have to be.

I hope he knows that durian is a variety of fruit that smells like rotting flesh. Appropriate ‘cause this guy fuckin’ STINKS.