Thank you. On that note, can someone recommend a skincare routine that isn’t like, twenty steps long and doesn’t involve a bazillion things I will inevitably not use and thus waste my money on? I can handle, like, moisturizer and eye cream, I think.

It’s just going to be a never-ending series of terrible racist “jokes” for the next few Olympics.

We’re doing a cheese plate for dinner! I’m so excited.

And in four years when the Winter Olympics are in Beijing!

As I said above, it’s concerning because it does give Congress more room to cut the programs in question as we all get grateful for crumbs—like, cutting already-stretched programs by 25% is a-okay because at least they didn’t get eliminated! 

It does not become fact entirely. However, it does give Congress more room to cut the programs in question because we all get grateful for crumbs—like, cutting already-stretched programs by 25% is a-okay because at least they didn’t get eliminated!

Sorry, sorry, Poe’s Law strikes again.

It came from his own Twitter post, bro, calm down. And yes, I watched the curling, and he is a total athlete.

I’m in agreement with you. I don’t think we should have to worry about losing our professional licenses for possession because we live in a backwards-ass state.

Ughhh that was sort of what helped me stay mostly on track for my Drynuary—I was so sick for most of it.

The point is, he doesn’t do it now!

I would have a problem because a) he has zero conditions that in our state would allow him to get a medical license so b) that would mean my extremely rule-following, straight-laced husband has suddenly taken up lying to authorities and faking “intractable epilepsy” to smoke weed (the only condition where you can get…

I mean, if my husband took up pot, we’d have to have serious talks about where our marriage was going! Especially since pot is almost entirely illegal in our state bar a couple of medical conditions, and I am not willing to be arrested as an accessory and/or lose my law license. It would also just be so out of…

Actually! Captain Awkward answered a letter just today from a woman writing in about her pothead boyfriend, and her answer was also that they should break up because they are not compatible. The guy there was acting pretty shitty outside of his pot use, but the conclusion was basically that they would be incompatible…

THANK YOU. No one should be watching this farce. You can read all the fawning news articles later, folks! Save yourselves and the Nielsen ratings!

Oh totally! They’re, uh, also definitively triggered by stress, atmospheric pressure changes, my menstrual cycle and dehydration, so basically my body is a tightrope balancing act, but Botox and a few other things are working pretty well.

Yeah, it’s all the booze: white wine, rum, vodka, anything. Even with water, even with food. I was able to play the pattern off as “oh, well, I’m getting all these migraines anyway!” but now that I’m on new meds and I’ve had a lot of control days of not drinking, the pattern is too clear. I’ll probably still have a…

I would agree with that. Though they’re going to have a hell of a problem with him having an expired tourist visa, because the adoptee has to be here legally. So they’re going to have to take the son back to Canada and re-file everything and who knows how much trouble they’ll get in over the visa.

What I’m saying is, it should have been automatic based on the USCIS guidance had they just considered his son adopted. It’s obviously not going to be now. I’m really curious to see if that’s going to be an argument brought up by either side though. (Example: Government saying “you should have gone through the…

Okay, I am NOT an immigration attorney. But since Andrew’s name is on the birth certificate for his “non-genetic” son, would that not count as adoption, which would qualify his son under the Child Citizenship Act to automatically become a citizen? This doesn’t make any sense to me.