Good friend of mine went to the same H.S. at Kellen Winslow in San Diego but was 3 years under him and the one story that always popped out was he had a habit of peeing the bed of chicks he’d hook up with. Not by accident, like a calling card.

The U! He pulled more tail than a slow kid at a petting zoo!

Crazy part is if you removed Peyton’s head and attached it to Nick Foles body you would have Peyton Manning and a spare Peyton for parts. This would be a very Jalop thing to d0 with a 40 year old RWD manual.

How would that make them better Fantasy owners?

Motel 6 off of Brokaw Rd? Come on man! I’d expect that out of a James Madison or Silver Creek Alum. There’s an app for that!

When China heard they were getting 2 Brazilians you can tell they were confused when they realized it wasn’t money.

We takin predator face Lexus?

So call it a Ninja Turtle on PEDs. Say it has a face for radio. I don’t care. I’d still own one over any BMW or Merc SUV.

You know how they say a picture is worth a thousand words? You nailed it. Except if we are holding true to metaphors, Ensign Marty probably didn’t have his phaser drawn. Hill Shot First.

It seems like he was just sticking around long enough to get his name out so when Hillary wins the nom he might be a popular enough pick for VP.

Where would we be without Jim Cooke?

In a far worse place, let’s face it.

Rock, Flag and Eagle!!!!

Thanks for the nice write up, Patrick. I took a picture from a race I saw in Asia, and while I found this fellow’s bike suspicious, but I couldn’t put my finger on it.

I got nothing clever. Get fucked.

A Subaru dealer sold me a used car with Scion badges on it, but every other part of the car says “Subaru” or “Made by Subaru!” Even the Scion badges have Subaru logos on the backside! What kind of scam is that?!?!

This guy just did a reverse Tavarish.

So if it’s reported that he was 23, it’s safe to say, given he was a dominican ballplayer, that he was actually 43.

Those are the best jokes! May I introduce you to 500 Days of Kristin?

This still remains the worst moment in Plano East Athletics history: