Those temperatures are horrible! We’re slowly, slowly falling out of the 90s here in Southern Louisiana. Meanwhile, I’m trying to convince my partner to move to Connecticut. 

I think that piano-playing mantids would be a welcome addition to any home office.  Can you imagine that bad boy or girl on a corner of your desk playing jazz standards and accepting tips of spiders and flies in a tiny tip jar?

Fall is, without hyperbole, my favorite thing about life on earth. My image of a perfect day involves fog and chill and pumpkins and piles of yellow leaves on the ground. It involves snuggling up with blankets and coffee and bundling up in wooly sweaters and thick socks and listening to crows cawing from the branches…

I’m just sitting here waiting for the spooky experience competition to start. 

Ummmm I appreciate the bare minimum effort to Journalist (Which Is Your Job), I guess

Why are you surprised that receptionists at random hair salons are not wasting their time entertaining a random phone caller’s random questions about extensions at the RNC?

Bonespurs McBunkerbitch is a lazy bag of lard and farts. He's also a pathological malignant narcissist. And if his fans could ignite a second Civil War it would be his wet dream come true.

And now for some reason she changed "27" to "20," and never changed "senior" to "junior." Lol!

Well, Brad Pitt had a rough stretch for a while there, and that’ll age a person. I think Paul Rudd’s managed to steer clear of that kinda shit.

Hold on, I read “20 years his senior” which to me, sounds like she’s the older one.

I think you meant 27 years his junior.

Sounds about reich.

No, silly. That’s how we mop up hurricanes.

I would like an armored exoskeleton, please and thank you. 

As I said over at The Root, is anyone surprised it was a 17 year old? Gunning down protesters is the new school shootings. But instead of being reviled, they get praise. 

What a fucking hellscape this timeline is

It’s absolutely not your fucking job, you delusional piece of shit. Apparently he used to work as a life guard at the local Y, but even if that’s what he’s referring to, life guards tend to not carry AR-15s as part of the job.

If you show up to the protest with a gun you’re there to start conflict, not “resolve” it.

I would love to hear more details, but understand they might point to your true identity. I totally believe you, and your g-grandfather sounds like a badass turning them down. It also just occurred to me that the youths may not get that when I said Joe Kennedy I meant JFK/RFK’s father.

My granny used to tell me never to vote for a Kennedy because Joe Kennedy (JFK’s father, not the current one) repeatedly tried to bribe her father (my g-grandfather).