You know what?

All those videos of Hills warmly interacting with kids are clearly CGI, duh.

Eh, plenty of fathers don’t care about kids, even their own. I think President Obama just has a really soft spot for children. He seems to light up around them.

He’s a dad. He just happens to be the president, too.

He seems to absolutely love children. Every picture I have seen of him with kids just warms my heart.

Yeah, I’ve kind of gotten used to the fact that whenever a friend has kids that I’ll see less of her. Not because she doesn’t socialize anymore, but because she will mostly socialize with other people who have kids. I mean, I understand the reasons why, but it still makes me kind of sad.

I fucking love how much she says fuck. Also, much appreciate her saying us childless women are brave. I get so many annoying comments about my lack of children...why don’t you have kids? When are you going to have kids? Don’t you want kids? What, you don’t have kids? Oh, you’ll change your mind, kids are the most…

I decided not to have children. It’s not bravery, but I do have to prepare myself for the neighborhood functions. The cold shoulder I get from the moms is very chilly.

So the guy perpetrates the violence and then blames the woman for not preventing it? (Checks all of human history.) YUP! CHECKS OUT!

I vividly remember crying and crying and crying one Halloween because my mom made me wear a coat over the absolutely gorgeous gold ball gown she’d made for my Belle costume.

My costumes were always homemade, I never bought costumes. It’s totally doable.

THEN WHY DON’T YOU MAKE YOUR DAUGHTER A COSTUME, ERICK?!?!

I would totally wear a slutty Erick Ericson costume, but I don’t know if it would resonate with the other parents....

Nothing good from someone who has two first names.

Here’s a start to the party...

I wish I hadn’t watched the videos on her Instagram. Even when she’s dancing she looks forced, awkward, and miserable. What a great life.

NOW I get it! I was struggling to figure out who she’s supposed to be.... I had forgotten this Christina look, or else it just wasn’t different enough from Kylie’s normal.

Did it take anyone else a minute to get the Taylor Swift costume joke? I kept staring at it like, “Okay, I see Beyoncé and Rihanna and the baby is Prince but where is Taylor?”

Kylie looks great as Christina, she’s used to looking like somebody else.

They should prosecute the parents too for allowing this piece of shit near their daughters.