Fuck off, Tomato.

Laredo Taco Company in Stripes stores in Texas have free bfast taco if you text Taco to 88388. Today only from 6-10.

“The press conference is being drowned out by Chumbawumba” is just an amazing fucking sentence and I’m sure it will be my final thought before I die and I am hashtag-blessed for that. 

Only 32% oppose it, 56% support it and the rest are fence sitters

I firmly think that if the Senate votes and acquits him, the DNC should start openly soliciting help from foreign interests to take out their Senators. If you’re going to say it’s normal, let’s make it normal.

They’re afraid of just how exactly they got all that.

I like when all the fake fucking Christians just go hang out together.  Don’t bother my ass none.

Two words: Cheap. Grace.

He looks like the president in a Lifetime TV movie.

All 24 hour cable news channels should be rocketed into the sun.

I guffawed when the Finnish president ended the joint press conference by standing next to Trump and saying America has spent hundreds of years building a democracy and he hopes we keep it up.

Don’t leave out this:

Put that fucking Sergeant-at-Arms to work, motherfuckers.

“He obviously meant ‘niggardly’! You’re the real racist here!”

Likely explanation: He believes it’s called a “cockstrap” because it covers your cock.

“YOU’RE MAKING ME LOOK LIKE A F***ING IDIOT!”

So since you guys love whataboutism, when Clinton was impeached that was actually an illegal coup by the Republican party?

 You're not an intelligent person and nobody values anything you have to say. 

“[Insert my opinion]. This is barely debatable. [Call yourself a realist or something about common sense.”

What kills me is there are so many people who identify with the BILLIONAIRES in the billionaires vs. everyone else scenario. They envision the government coming in and taking whatever huge percentage on their $50k/year salary and are suddenly like, OH NO PROTECT THE BILLIONAIRES! What is the quote, they are all…