These are still so true:

It isn’t blackface. The outrage committee at Jezebel needs to STFU.

So unstable.

To be fair, that is pretty unusual.

Some countries use the comma where we use the decimal point.

Everything is.

The Higgs doesn't give everything mass. Particles like the proton and neutron get their mass from the kinetic energy of the quarks contained. It gives mass to particles that without the Higgs field would be massless, like the weak force bosons.

There are some. Using official accounts. Spare me the sob for the rest.

Who the fuck cares? It's Twitter! Walk away....

Nope. They want a a fair trial, and a first-class hanging.

The SJW definition of racism suits their politics. Nobody else pays the slightest attention to it.

No, I'm not trying at all.

Apparently not - you're still whining about being insulted.

I realize that comparing you to Justin Bieber may not be insulting to you.

Cry on someone else's shoulder. For a grown man he's girly.

"Totes" is a verb that has a meaning. If the demographic is silly twit kids, you're right but I don't even hear them in SoCal use it.

Common slang among silly pathetic asswipes, maybe. Totes belongs on the top of lists of words compiled every year that should be banned unless used as a verb.

Using "totes" makes you sound like an even more girly version of Justin Bieber.

Totes would not be pleasing to the ear, and it looks looks a grammatical error in print. I only ever see a few silly people use it here. Anywhere else, never. Not in speech, not in writing.