I hate all these celebrity paternity stories (this one, the constant rumors about Khloe Kardashian, etc.). Regardless of the DNA test, Bill Clinton is her father. That’s how parenthood works. Biological origins are useful for medical histories, and that’s about it; they are certainly of no use to the public. All of…

KARMA

I don’t understand how this cardboard cutout is casting a human shadow.

True. My entire front yard was lava and simultaneously full of sharks.

WHAT IS IT

It’s been a long time coming, but I’m gonna go ahead and come out with it: I actually kind of love Kim Kardashian.

is nic cage standing behind you holding you a gunpoint while your typing these?

This is the best thing I have ever seen in my entire life

Usually, since you’re gray, I wouldn’t bother. But. I’m in a mood.

Wait, didn’t today’s Midweek Madness or this morning’s Dirt Bag say that J Law was moving in to Chris’ mansion??

HOLY SHIT IT’S MY DOG YOU GUYS THAT’S MY DOG!!!

Rickety hickory dock.

Surely a movie with this star power could have pulled Michelle Dockery to play a part for no other reason than her last name.

Hickory dickory cock.

Really, the dock should be billed first.

This movie has everything. It’s like a Stefon description of a club. Deception, infidelity, bad wigs, a rotten dock, one of those country farm stands, a guy who likes like Pacey from Dawson’s Creek, but with tattoos, in an old striped truck...

Bridget Rode His Cock

Hickory dickory dock.

A Deadly Adockption.

I don’t think Lifetime is in on the joke.