I'm relatively smart and occasionally funny.

I don't have a blatant disregard for foul language. I fucking love it. Its the fucking shit. Fucking foul language is fucking awesome. I embrace foul language, I don't disregard it.

Yeah, the tattoos, THAT'S why you'll never fuck her.

Do you want to know the terrifying truth, or do you want to see me sock a few dingers?!

To shreds you say.

I shudder to think what the 'Alpha Males' in r/redpill are saying about this.

Looks like the Palinbot is having trounle running that Reagan subroutine installed with its latest firmware upgrade.

Pun threads are the wurst.

Because she herself admits that she is gaming the system in the recent Guardian article. (http://www.theguardian.com/culture/2014/a…)

I would have enjoyed this more had I not recently learned that Christina Hendricks is a terrible person who takes advantage of the ADA to bring a dog wherever she goes.

I was blocked by the Ring Of Honor wrestling twitter.

When Kelly & Michael viewers are too smart for your content, its probably time to reevaluate.

So they took Orson Scott Card's anti-funeral 'Speaker for the Dead' and found a way to apply it to weddings.

I first became aware of this about ten years ago, the summer my oldest boy, Bill Jr. died. You know that carnival comes into town every year? Well this year they came through with a ride called The Mixer. The man said, "Keep your head, and arms, inside the Mixer at all times." But Bill Jr, he was a DAAAREDEVIL, just…

I will take advantage of any opportunity to make Dead Milkmen references.

I first became aware of this about ten years ago, the summer my oldest boy, Bill Jr. died. You know that carnival comes into town every year? Well this year they came through with a ride called The Mixer. The man said, "Keep your head, and arms, inside the Mixer at all times." But Bill Jr, he was a DAAAREDEVIL, just…

And the face turn is complete.

"Like many here, I am starting to complain about how this site is falling of the Journalistic Wagon into the dumbing down that America is sinking comfortably into."

All of this will be solved once everything is Taco Bell and we have our three sea shells.

My mother wanted to name me Christopher Robin.