Jesus fucking Christ. Probably we should just call all celebrities directly and tell them how they should be *correctly* addressing the need for sensible gun laws. Do you have Amy Schumer’s phone number? She’s doing it all wrong! Congress?! She’s an amateur.

^This, all goddamned day.

And the award for best mugshot goes to....the guy who goes into the bathroom naked, carrying a knife!

Fuck, no. Luxury real estate in Oklahoma is anything not located in Oklahoma.

Is it just me, or does Chad have the look of a recent parolee who’s been out working on the docks and rolling in dirt all day? He looks filthy.

Just said this above :)

Yup. Anti-death penalty here but fine with vigilante justice.

I wish this guy was going to general population. He’ll be relatively safe on death row, sadly. He’ll also likely live longer there than he would in general pop.

God didn’t do much for the gorilla. He plays favorites, like, all the damn time.

I fucking hated zoos already. This just makes me hate them more.

Good for you, Tay Tay! I'm sorry about that situation, but glad you're strong enough to cut ties w/ shitty fam.

Good for you. Yay for cutting out assholes, even if they happen to share our DNA!

Yup. I wouldn't get rid of mine if I were in that situation, either.

I like your style, Your Highness.

Your dad sounds emotionally abusive. Actually, he sounds like a real shit. I’m sorry you have to deal with that and hope he’s not a part of your life now.

That's a great description.

You are very right. They’re the sneakiness- so sweet and sinister. You don’t know anything’s hit you til you’ve reached the bottom of the cup. Ever had a hand grenade? Similar.

Yes, please!

I know. She was legit casual, like it was a pet cemetery. No, honey, those are the bones of PEOPLE that your family OWNED.

Good advice!