Heck, I’d settle for the play to be filmed and shown in the theater. The one by us shows orchestras, operas, etc from time to time from around the world.

If I could tell my 27 year old self anything it’d be: stop drinking soda (lost almost 30 lbs over a year after dropping soda and doing nothing else) and get in to the doctor for a regular checkup. Had undiagnosed high blood pressure for who knows how long doing damage. Also I’d tell myself to put down the video games…

I know vigilante justice is bad... but in a case like this where you tried to do things the right way and it failed...

That made me laugh so, so, so hard. In a good way. Your daughter is awesome, and I can’t remember a post that has brought me such random joy. Thanks!!

Could do 62% of a game, easier to quantify that way. The first 62% of course, so they don’t keep winning anyways :D

They have your number from the times you’ve called them about the job... doesn’t take Sherlock Holmes for them to connect you to the review if you’re specifically talking about what went wrong. A different situation for a restaurant or something, but for a contractor or plumber or what have you who is coming to your…

And it came out of nowhere for us! It was like one day the twins were just toddling around... the next they were running at Mach 6! And yeah, I (the dad) switched to a pseudo retirement/work from home situation so I am the primary caretaker. I think because I’m a dad (and look a bit mean, though I’m not!) I never get…

That whole fucking zoo is an incline! Ughhhhhhhh. We got ours leashed too, one seems about ready to be done with it. The other continues to think she is the Flash.

It’s fucking amazing how fast my three year olds are. I’m an older dad too, so its hard to freaking keep up. They get leash toddler backpacks when we’re in the city/zoos/museums/crowded places, don’t give a fuck what anyone thinks... they’re safe.

We keep our toddlers on backpack leashes when in crowded as hell places. Don’t give a fuck what anybody else thinks, after sneezing twice in a row my 3 year old was literally 15 feet away from me at full sprint ducking around the corner at a museum. Luckily it was a dead end, but had I turned left instead of right…

Lost a fake wallet twice in Chicago to muggings, both times they made off with I think $20 and some change and credit cards that were long expired. Worked like a charm!

That’s nuts. My father in law became a gynecologist because his mother and several of his aunts died of cervical cancer.

Same here! Just blast water in my face in the shower. Though, no makeup here either.

Yeah I didn’t walk at either my undergrad or graduate ceremonies. Had better things to do. (Though the graduate ceremony I was already living 15 hours away, so there is that).

You can dunk? Never know when that’ll come in handy!

What do you have in your pocketses, hobbit?

I’m the same way, I say it jokingly but I think I’d seriously never date again. I’ve got the kids for one, and they’d be the priority if my wife passed or left or was abducted by aliens. Then its like... how do I date as an adult? I’d have to .... go places? And interact with... strangers? Uh... no thanks. Then even…

31 is still wild, don’t worry :D Heck those were the best years for me, cause I had money and stability. Now that I’m in my 40s... I just want to nap. :D

It was a lot of words to be completely wrong, that’s for sure.

Man I bet you feel stupid now.