Shampoo was extra - I think it consisted of massaging rancid whipped cream into one’s scalp and then rinsing it off with melted butter. Tres chic!

I paid $2,100 for a “French Laundry” once. Turns out it was 3 Parisian prostitutes with hairy armpits spitting on me for 15 minutes and then blasting me with hair dryers.