For the rest of us, with apologies to Walt Whitman:

Mike Pence was Race-ally profiled, too.

"Bar-Trivia Champ Being A Real Dick About It."

At least you had them before they were cool, GIK.

I am not a fan of this new kind of Tension.

I think he's realizing that his salad days are behind him.

the Mall of America is *thataway*

http://www.gocomics.com/tom…

I'm a veteran of the Cola Wars myself.

Can Jughead Chug Head?

I'd like to think that they could devote an episode of the upcoming season to solve the disappearance of Judge Crater.

What's a gill?

SVCK IT TREBEK!

Chuck Palahniuk is gaining fast around the stretch, though…

The Dave Eggers of Uggs.

Yeah that was years ago…

I thought you were filling out your Match.com profile.

Juggernaut, bitch?

*hic*

The gallium of this guy to ditch his signature franchise!