and this part from the wiki page

Best part: Jesus got suspended, not for punching a janitor, but for doing it AGAIN.

I’m a male and had a male boss constantly give me unwanted attention because of what I suspected to be a foot fetish. I’m a single guy and only have myself to worry about in life, and for most single people that means having excess money. That I then spend on things. Work was business casual and for me, mainly out of…

I was hired into a high end photography studio. My degree is in art and gallery management and I was brought on to sell sessions with the photographer— his clientele included mayors, celebrities, whatever. I quickly found out that he had a secret side business making “erotic art” which TBH was straight up porn. So I’m…

I always thought women with larger noses (Fran Drescher, Barbara Streisand) were really attractive. Grew up in a place where I could probably count the number of Jewish residents on fingers and toes (it was pretty much all Scandinavian), so I always saw Jewish women as kind of classy and exotic.

My step-mother started calling me “rump roast” when I hit puberty and developed hips and an ass. She also told me that I should be careful, because she could already see that I was going to be fat like my father. I was under 100 pounds at the time.

I’ve had a couple of good ones from my mother, who is otherwise the sweetest woman in the world. It’s like she needs a break from being so nice once or twice a year and has to say something mean.

I think mine might be up there with the most messed up. It also isn’t especially light-hearted and involves some pretty bad language. You’ve been warned.

I had a friend whose mother had a very violent temper, used to scream obscenities at her son at the drop of a hat, in front of anyone, she didn’t give a flying…fig…and once she screamed at him that he was a son of a bitch. And he replied quite enthusiastically, “Yes, I am!”

That is hilarious. My dad has scars across his knuckles because the nuns hit him with a metal edged ruler every time he wrote or picked something up with his left hand. (Left hand being the hand of Satan, obviously)

Ain’t that the truth!

My dad has very distinctive facial features including a prominent Syrian nose. When we were young my mom used to comment how glad she was that none of us inherited it. Jokes on her because by the time we started highschool all of us had it to one degree or another. I’m actually rather fond of my nose now.

(The strangest thing about that, perhaps, wholly apart from its effect on my self-esteem, was the fact that my mother was a German-Jewish Holocaust survivor who, despite her pride in being Jewish, had thoroughly internalized Aryan, inherently anti-Semitic, standards of attractiveness.)

You were right, super similar! Although I looked like a carbon copy of my dad from birth, so the big nose wasn’t exactly a surprise. Luckily, my dad is a good looking guy! But as a child, I wanted to look like my mom so badly.

Very similar! Although I had sort of the opposite experience. Had a giant Jewish/Italian nose growing up, but when I started high school, I grew into my nose. I still occasionally get made fun of for the bump, but I love it, so I’m pretty happy I didn’t get a nose job now.

My kids are going to be writing about the things I say to them no doubt in a few years. My 10 years old whines ‘You are making me FEEL BAD!’ when I tell him he starting to smell and his hair looks gross and matted to his head and he needs to wash NOW. “WELL TAKE A SHOWER and then we’ll all feel better! You don’t want…

My father once said to me during my harsh transition into a pubescent sixteen year old “So are you gay?” with a serious but smug look on his face. As a straight male this is probably one of the most hateful and embarrassing questions to have your own father ask you. Probably closely behind the “You fucking kids” that…

My parents were pretty cool about my looks, but when I was a teen I had a fairly serious case of acne. One time my Gramma said, “You’re such a lovely girl. Too bad about your face.”

Well my dad called me a chubby know it all one time. Asked me if I felt I couldn’t get a man when I started dating a trans man (he obviously did not consider him a man and made it clear to me on numerous occasions), and told me that he’s glad I got a promotion because now I ‘make an effort.’ Could be worse. On the…

My mom would very often line my two older sisters and I up like the Von Trapp children before Maria came, and my mom would critique us. And she’d go in order, oldest to youngest. Best impersonation of my mom I can do over the ‘net *Warm, fond tone* “Sarah, you’re so beautiful, so tall. You look just like me. Sandra..…