Just on principal, I don't know if I can support a company whose marketing campaign for the past decade has been based on the joke line "Does a bear shit in the woods?"

Remember when he was the 'cool ethnic kid' on Silver Spoons? Were the 80's nothing but a lie to us?

"Taking naps at work shows that I've been busy and actually increases productivity."
"Jerry, your shift starts at 9. It's 9:15, and you were ten minutes late."

… willingly.

Can I interest you in my BeGoogler (TM)? Only 19.95. But if you order within the next fifteen minutes, I'll throw the DeGoogler absolutely free(pay separate processing and handling).

Wait… wait… Are you saying corporations mislead in order to manipulate consumers into a desire to buy their products? What has this world turned into?

Yeah, people buy consoles for stability. Yes, I can build a PC more powerful for a console for less money right now, but in two years when I want to play the latest, greatest game, I may have to drop another hundred or two on a new graphics card in order to play it. You buy a console for the long haul. The Xbox 360 is…

The girl going to the party is the one that really gets me. That's the equivalent of showing up to someone else's party, plugging your iPod into their stereo, and then playing your own music.

I can see why someone would have to feed him chocolates due to the make-up and the gloves. I guess the defining factor of the story would be if that was that guy's only job and was he always on call.

I hate the Grinch movie for the simple fact that it boils down to "Well, if he'd just get laid, he'd chill out."

I think that it's just the packaging covering it up. I've seen the Funko fig and it has the Mohawk. Because of the aesthetic design of the line, it doesn't start until almost the middle of the top of the fig's head.

A few minor modifications to that Black & Decker Jr. Chainsaw will fix that.

Damnit, AV Club!

The kids still have nightmares.

Yeah, as much as I love the show, now is not the time to be wearing anything that says 'ISIS' on it.

That joke was just poorly… EXECUTED.

They're really SLASHING prices! Heheheeeee!

Two Mormon missionaries showed up at my place the morning after we'd used if for my friend's bachelor party. There literally was not a spot on my huge coffee table that didn't have an empty beer or liquor bottle on it. "We're here to talk about the fate of your eternal soul." Their faces then dropped as they got a…

I thought Russellites were Kurt Russell fans. I've got to go and cancel this weekend's showing of The Thing. Man, that was almost a big mistake.

"I just don't understand these hi-tech cassette tapes."