Memphis, Kansas City, Little Rock, Charlotte…

I have been to Houston; terrible tap water, hot and humid as hell, but a nice airport in Bush Intercontinental.

I lived in a real bad area of SF a few years back; packs of Newports were 95 cents. Couldn't imagine what effect discounted Courvoisier would have.

As someone who's spent all but five years of my life in L.A. (other five in the Bay Area), it sure as hell doesn't sound like it.

I almost moved there for a job; am I missing anything?

He's high-functioning…

As our pal Phil Miller showed…

Actually, I think of myself as a pretty responsible drinker. Love the juice—who doesn't—but not to the point where it impacts my ability to do my job and function.

And the complete unwillingness of wanting to interact with another human being. The last Amazon package I got, the guy didn't even bother to ring the doorbell. I just walked out and it was there.

Being buzzed is great, but I have a ton of shit to do that requires me to be sober.

"Being sober es el diablo."

Are you an Allahu Akbar?

No, been on AV for several years. Booze consumption all depends on my mood.

I would think Spielberg's non-union Mexican equivalent would be a little more perturbed.

Oh, that wasn't me being a smart-ass. That's how far the Total Wine is from where I live. Of course, I could go to any of the 18 liquor stores or supermarkets, but too expensive.

I hate driving 8 miles to get my booze, but on the other hand, I don't need it THAT badly.

I don't see Emma Roberts being nominated anytime soon…

Looking forward to this upcoming season; Freak Show didn't disappoint after the somewhat sloppy finish to Coven.

Deep insight from Frank Drebin. In all seriousness, yes, there are quite a few whackjobs out there, in cyberspace and out on the street.

No, that part I knew. It still bugs me. We're not in ancient Roman times.