I just spent five minutes writing a Star Wars version of "The Aristocrats" and got so depressed halfway through that I'm going to have to volunteer at a soup kitchen this weekend or something.

My childhood was unofficially raped. I didn't even get the notarized card.

The Ghoulden Girls

I'm pretty sure everybody likes Andrea and Carl.

I wonder what percentage of The Walking Dead's viewership would find "an innately likable Muslim" a contradiction in terms.

"Restless Reedus" sounds like a Lewis Carroll creature. He bears the vorpal crossbow.

It's extremely effective for the first hour. It's really too bad it wasn't just about monsters in the woods.

Yeah, you'd think he'd be content just dragon their names through the mud.

I don't know why you're so Sauron Tolkien.

There is no way Hammond didn't try out some bronto burger at some point in the breeding process. Spared no expense.

Well, that T-Rex bit his leg. He had to open his shirt up.

If you don't want to see how the dino sausage gets made stay out of Henry Wu's kitchen.

It has always been the lamest field event.

What I wouldn't give to see Lrrr, Ruler of Omicron Persei VIII eat Donald Trump on national TV. Ride the walrus.

Probably one of these:

He bombed an airfield too. It put an end to the Syrian conflict, if I remember my cable news correctly.

I probably saw it too late. It was towards the end of the theatrical release and it had been billed to me in a "you will love this" kind of way. I'd have likely enjoyed it as a genre piece more if I saw it early in its run.

Without the black humor.

The entire robbery story is essentially a less compelling version of Ryan Gosling's half of The Place Beyond the Pines. And everyone decided they hated that movie for some reason.

Yeah, that was a bummer. I really wanted to see Toby Kebbel star in a movie.