Don't use lube, at least.

This guy gets it!

How about you go straight to hell?

They aren't wiping the comments. They said that they're saving them, only in Kinja form.

I've got a few surprises up my sleeve.

Holy crap. Somebody else made the bad sheriff joke!

*And now, my internal process of how I make comments*

Back when my law firm used to have 400 people working at it before the layoffs, we used to employ a large selection of vastly overweight people. And whenever there was cake or doughnuts or any kind of food in the lunch room and it was announced, there would literally be a stampede to get to the food.

"You're just eating the donuts wrong."

There's the Avacado aka AV Club After Dark.

My 3.5 years on this site has led up to that single joke.

I read the AV Club.

Yes, I will, but not because you said so. I thought of it last night. You can't ruin my spontaneity!

Something, something, Graboid menace, something, something, Trump, something, something, Kinja, something.

And I thought WE were anti-social losers!

Are they going to get nuked along with the rest of us? Do they even know what's coming? Do they know what year it is?

"I need…liq-uor…"

Go here:

Noooope.

'Cause those Univision bosses are so headstrong!