I'm not Jeff Goldbloom, but I have been called the Great White Hype on a few occasions.

Uhhh, could I ummm, delete a few files and/or AV Club comments before you go off and save the whole damn net?

Thank god that story started with "My Ex"…

LOL, your daughter can't talk good like us.

you mean coitus?

PART OF IT!

It's not the distraction we wanted, but it's the distraction we need.

Every time I step on the scale and see a large number, I always think to myself "It's not ME, it's just the food is too heavy."

The true Linsanity has begun.

Right - I try to take those kind of "I've heard that so-and-so is a jerk" anecdotes with a grain of salt, but you hear it enough times and you have to think there's some validity to it.

Isn't he a superhero because of ICJ, though?

Yeah, I mean I love Good Eats, and he's a great host on IC, but he's always had a bit of an abrasive, my way or the highway attitude.

Is there a highlight reel of the Chairman simply announcing every mystery ingredient? I'd watch that a half dozen times right now.

Can't see the line, can ya' Ricky Coogin?

But he has way worse odds at ever having a chance to sleep with a Portuguese waitress.

Perfectly fine if unspectacular!

If he wants mysteries unsolved, why is his new catch phrase

I declare you the Victor of all puns.

An awful lot of Diners, Drive-Ins & Dives and Property Brothers, along with football and college hoops. #InLawLimitations

As someone said on Twitter (can't remember who to give proper credit): Donald Trump is the 5th or 6th most credible presidential candidate in the cast of Home Alone 2