The Amy Santiago in me feels obliged to point out that they were makeshift lecterns.

You mistake me, sir.

Everyone's general disdain for Tosh.0 is warming the cold, black void where my heart is supposed to be.

The sole justification for candy corn's existence is if your chocolate poop needs realism. Like when I made a sphincter cake for my 20th birthday, and I mixed candy corn into the chocolate mousse filling.

Peeps are amazingly fun, microwaveable toys. They're just awful candy.

I think so. It's likely a holdover, safer-than-sorry lizard brain broad brush since bodily fluids range from harmless to vectors for lethal disease, bleeding ranges from a slight ooze to exsanguination. Safer to treat it all as bad.

People are generally grossed out by bodily fluids once they leave the body. It's a pretty common, reflexive taboo.

FWIW, I read it more as frustration than condescension.

Does anyone else have, "Cool Guys Don't Look at Explosions" stuck in your head after watching Punisher blow up his house?

Ding, ding, ding. We have a winner.

"You went on vacation and you chose Muncie, Indiana?"
"My wife and I have a timeshare."
"In Muncie?"

I like Kit-Kats unless I'm with four or more people.

Go around. I cannot open the wall. I don't know if you have a doorknob on the other side, but over here there's nothing.

More like in The Shining

More straw, please. The bedding in my feral cat colony boxes needs replacing.

Action movies sometimes have unrealistic fight scenes in which the scrappier, smaller protagonist wins?

It's not even about forgiveness anymore. He just sorta ruined my ability to enjoy his acting. He got so over the top that I can't forget that he's Mel Gibson and see him as the roles he's playing. The vitriol that he leveled at other people when he was having his meltdowns was so nutty and over the top that it's…

I have to change my answer to Paget Brewster. We don't look much alike except for both being brown-eyed brunettes, but based on her Drunk History episodes I think she could really capture my—MOTH!—essence. I also think Paget Brewster should be in everything.

I support this, as I am still bitter that she wasn't immediately cast in everything after her performance in Fargo.

John Belushi doing a John Candy impersonation while wearing a Chris Farley suit?