There was a time before autocomplete, before the stock offering, when you could just hit "return" on Google's homepage search bar and it would list the most-trafficked sites. If you did that early enough in Google's history, then its top suggestion was Yahoo.

Yeah, when his ground rules for President Bush on that show were explicitly stated as "I like him. I'm going to give him a pass" — I mean, if Jon Stewart had ever said that about Obama, we'd never hear the end of it.

We can't mention Hal Douglas without bringing up the trailer to "Comedian," which is a favorite of mine because it manages to convey a very Jerry Seinfeld tone without actually having any Jerry Seinfeld. (It ALSO makes it seem like a laugh-a-minute movie, and of course it's NOT, but yay Hal Douglas!) https://youtu.be/f…

Can I politely say "The animated versions of Charlie Brown and the 'Peanuts' gang actually debuted about five years before the Christmas special in a series of Ford commercials" and be seen as a basically helpful "Peanuts" fan and not as an aggravating Internet nitpicker?

There's sometimes a difference between "top billing" and "true star of the movie," though. Exhibit A: "Superman," starring Marlon Brando and Gene Hackman! Exhibit B: "Apocalypse Now," starring Marlon Brando and Robert Duvall! And it's probably unfair to make "Family Ties" Exhibit C, since that show evolved into…

*hears Sebulba is still available, bets heavily on him*

I *did* get one, after I finally got smart and remembered to start saving the action figure packages to collect the stamps required for those mail-order offers. Honestly, you guys kinda dodged a bullet by not getting the adult Anakin action figure, because it brought my "Star Wars" playtime to a screeching halt:

Your idea sounds to me like Dinosaur Comics' "Scenes In Which The Earth Stops Spinning And Everybody Flies Into A Wall" and as such I love it without reservation and endorse it wholeheartedly. http://www.qwantz.com/index…

When this song came out, Sean Hannity played it a LOT on his radio show, and he urged his listeners to call their local radio stations and demand it be played — because apparently those stations were trying to suppress it. To this day, I'm amazed that Hannity could argue with a straight face that "the liberal media"…

Technically, an "iconoclast" is someone who's a breaker of images (from the Greek "eikon," or "image," and "klastes," or "breaker"). The word is more appropriately used to describe anyone who feels that drawings, paintings, sculptures, etc. can encourage idolatry and must be destroyed; ISIS fighters are engaging in…

I guess I used the verb because the first instance was at work in 1996 with people who were also mid-to-late 20s, and I realized very quickly that I was the only one watching WB cartoons. The second instance was in the mid-2000s, when I didn't dress up for Halloween because I worked nights, and a supervisor asked, "So…

On at least three occasions I've used the line "And I am the Iconoclast, an unconventional eccentric who marches to the beat of a different drummer" and then been forced into a tedious explanation of what an iconoclast is and why that line is funny ("So these mice, they want to take over the world. And the SMART one,…

"I hate hospitals. My friend Matty Fishbein went into the hospital a healthy guy. Then boom, BOOM! Dead! Just like that, in his sleep. 98 years old, no apparent cause."
— Sophia Petrillo (Estelle Getty), "The Golden Girls"

…pants.

Bystander: "You're talking about 'what's-her-name'? That's Pepper Ann! She's like one in a million!"

Definitely appointment TV for weirdos! And Cartoon Network got creative on the other nights of the week. I worked second shift at the time, so I'd come home late Friday nights to Boomerang on Cartoon Network ("Yogi Bear," "Augie Doggie," "Wacky Racers," "Perils of Penelope Pitstop" and "Funky Phantom"), and late…

I pre-ordered the ATHF Volume One discs years ago, so I got the version with the rush-job packaging: The guys are described as "teens" (changed to "creatures" in later releases), there's a weird double-space after Carl's name, and, most egregiously, the tiny trademark type at the bottom refers to them as "Auqa" Teen…

You may be thinking of the Gene Siskel Test: "Is this film more interesting than a documentary of the same actors having lunch?"

It also has Meatwad's immortal line, which the finale made a point of disproving: "Shoot, I'm so dumb as hell, I'll NEVER get hired in today's fast-paced world."

I worked with a guy back in early 1999 who said he'd been psyched for "Phantom Menace" for 22 years: "I saw 'Star Wars' the first week it came out, and I'll always remember when that 'Episode IV' scrolled up the screen, I turned to my wife and said, 'Whoa, where are the other three episodes?'"