This is one of those rare cases where I find myself agreeing with Steven Moffat. A Doctor Who movie wouldn't work, from a practical or artistic standpoint. For one thing, you're trying to sell a character whose appeal is inherently cultish and a little bit campy to the general moviegoing public, which is doomed to…

Kurt Russell said he's never seen an Expendables movie because those just seem like "looking backwards". I guess the difference between that franchise and this one is that this one keeps finding new ways to be ridiculous. The other one just adds cast members.

Should have challenged him to a wrestling match to see who gets the bed. Nothing gay about that.

I've always felt that libertarians, at some very deep level, are just people who don't give a fuck. Bill Maher is liberal, but he's almost libertarian in some respects. One of my best friends from grad school was a libertarian army veteran from Tennessee. One of those charmingly folksy hillbilly types. He was the only…

I notice that for a lot of anti-gay douchebags, it's anal sex that really drives them up the wall. I haven't visited God Hates Fags in years, but I distinctly remember a graphic of some dude bending over in front of another dude on their front page. Homophobia directed at men and homophobia directed at women are two…

Why do all these homosexuals keep sucking my cock?

Vasily Livanov would be Jupiter in that analogy.

DOB needs to leave Cracked and go start his own website. If he could take Swaim with him, more the better. But he's one of the only things I still like about that stupid website.

Now you've got me picturing Tatiana Maslany as Moriarty. She could do it.

Setting aside the implausibility of a guy being able to store millions of people's dirty little secrets in his head with perfect recall, the instant he told Sherlock and Watson his secret, Magnussen was toast. I kept waiting for him to reveal an extra wrinkle to his plan to safeguard against somebody just shooting him…

I love Julianne Moore, but I really don't feel like sitting through that movie. It reeks of being an Oscar prestige picture, and I almost wonder if she took the role just to get the award that she was long overdue. I'm glad to hear she made the most of it, however.

Lone Star is a great movie. The side characters are all aces. I can't name too many
other movies off the top of my head that did such a good job evoking a
particular time and place. See it.

I rewatched The Fall at a friend's place last month. It holds up fairly well to a second viewing. The same flaws in terms of story are present, but the visuals are as striking as ever. Ebert's review of that is a work of art all by itself. He always was a sucker for films with strong imagery but weak storytelling. I…

Whenever somebody tells me that they can't bear to see other people wasting their potential, I think that maybe they should focus on realizing their own potential first. It's that kind of self-righteous pseudo-altruism that is behind so much evil. Stop depending on me to be the person you can't bring yourself to be.…

I was born in Michigan and lived there until I was seven, when my parents decided it would be more fun if we all lived in California. We need more stuff set there. Freaks and Geeks was great, and since I've been digging into the horror genre over the past few years, It Follows just jumped to the top of my must-see…

The main hassle this week was getting a smartphone. Let me back up. I need to supplement my income (no, not even two jobs is quite enough to make ends meet in this very expensive area), so I decided to apply to Taskrabbit. Only thing is, you need an iPhone or Droid to work for them, so I figured it was time to join…

Gary Russell tried to give her a send-off in his novel The Scales of Injustice, which is no more than so-so overall, but does contain a final scene between Three and Liz that is reasonably well-written.

One of my favorite little moments in this serial comes at the end. I like that wave the Master gives as he is escaping in the hovercraft, as if to say, "We'll be seeing each other again soon." But it's not that great of a storyline otherwise.

I'm inclined to be generous with this one just because I like Roger Delgado so much. His fight scene with the Doctor is pretty cool, at least.

Megamind was okay. Not great, just okay. Ferrell was probably the best thing about it.