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Moist
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Maybe he thinks of himself as an emotional teacher-er.

You tried and you failed. The lesson is: never try.

50.

The great American navel, obviously.

Does ejaculating on someone count as writing?

Holy shit, the birth control bit was great.

Genuinely great job internet. Seems like part of an entirely different feature.

I was not aware of these 8-bit covers. They're really good, somehow. Thanks!

Let me know when the Funky Bunch and that Marky Mark guy are lecturing.

That was the secret joke.

Secret Wars already happened! There were two of them! How come nobody knows about all of these Secret Wars?

Annie says "relax."

Rule number one is, we don't talk about Breakfast Club.

Put a Bird of Prey on it.

Catch you on the flip side, dudemeisters, NOT!

Let's hear it for moribund loopholes! By which I mean… never mind.

LOL

Inconceivable!

I can't think of anything more anxiety inducing than communicating with an omnipotent being.

Great news. Now can I get orange phosphorous back in my Kraft dinner?