I saw Jupiter Ascending. It was almost really good.

Is this the show about the guy who takes pictures of himself to travel back in time? Or is that going to be Adam Sandler's next movie?

Nuts & Gum: together at last!

How can the "R" be for anything other than Rhinestone?

I wish that, instead of sitting through the whole thing, I had acted like Elvis and left the building.

Would he be able to make an Arnold Palmer?

I was embarrassed for you when you went and cried to your mummy about it.

I thought Bubba Ho-Tep was a grave disappointment.

I can't tell because of this Koner silence.

Daddy needs to get his rocks off.

More of a [sic] burn, really.

Served up with a creme brûlée of canceraids.

When did they hire a copy editor? This morning?

I say go for it. We don't like you now, either.

John and the giant illustrated testicles are back! Hooray!

I liked it when it was a French short film.

She was growing tired of going to the den every time she wanted to "fire up" a Fantasia viewing in her private boudoir.

Obviously you're not a golfer. Because that's the term we use unless Tiger is around.

It would sound way better if Marky Mark spoke in Spanish.
"Conoces cual es? Es un camion robo!"

I liked Hardcore Standard Deviations 1-6, but after that the "talent" was just lowest common denominator.