I dunno about anyone else, but I had genuinely been planning to see it until this dumpster fire told me to. Sad!

It's just about connecting the dots from set piece to set piece, without any concern for what's in between. Or to put it one of Danny's stupid little "I've been learning about Buddhism online!" koans: the journey is unimportant.

Well, she has to fool horny men. That's not exactly super difficult when you look like Scarlett.

It's the reason she was so great in Under the Skin. I totally buy her as someone who doesn't quite understand how to act like an actual human being.

I'm still not convinced that this movie is real and not a throwaway joke showing up in the background of a sitcom.

Yeah, and honestly that scene better represents the gist of the movie. He's home alone, and seemingly buffeted on all sides by crazy criminals.

Can we discuss the iconic "oh no!" face that has become the symbol of the series?

Desaturating a picture makes it aesthetic. Got it!

Don't forget that he's scared of stairs.

Does Doughboys still have that insane intro music? The one that reminds me of the "Pizza Guy" jingle that gets Billy Crystal fired by Jeffrey Tambor in City Slickers?

First time I tried listening to BEE, he started unironically talking about social justice warriors, and that was all I needed to write it off completely.

Jake Gyllenhaal IS PissPigGrandad

I'm sure it's completely different, but the title made me immediately think of barley tea, which is one of the most unpleasant drinks I've ever experienced.

Problematic Crows is a fantastic name for a punk band.

That picture of their takeout looks like it came right out of Hannibal.

Seemed like a good idea

When did Big Bird's voice change?

Sorry. This guy has way too good a grasp of the English language to portray Trump.

Maybe Simmons just got fat again and doesn't want anyone to see him?

People in 1960: "The fact that Gone With the Wind is still in people's memories - whether good or bad - means movies are here to stay."