I started reading comments there, realized what was going on, and just left.

Ah, yes, Trump-induced boneus eruptus. A very common condition lately.

Oh, I know. I pulled the back seat out of mine and packed in almost everything I owned to move halfway across the country one time. The only thing that didn't fit was my bike, but I had a roof rack for that. I just had a difficult time trying to fit my legs in there and operate the pedals without hitting the steering…

The movie Legend was mentioned in the comments under another story recently, and I remembered having seen it probably a decade after it was in the theaters. Anyway, a song started playing over the end credits and I knew I recognized the woman's voice. Turned out to be Jon Anderson with Tangerine Dream. I felt like an…

Sure, they'll all be dead, but they'll take the rest of us with them. That'll show us!

All full of burned steak and ketchup!

But we still have to catch that shark!

That's only going to attract bears. Unless you cover the bacon with a clown.

They're jokes I remember from elementary school, and they were probably already quite old then.

Or the doctor who heard a scream coming from the exam room: "No, I told you to prick his boil!"

Like the doctor who was going to write something but pulled a thermometer out of their pocket: "Great, now some asshole's got my pen!"

I always thought chicken-fried ____ meant something prepared in the style of fried chicken, so chicken-fried chicken was simply fried chicken. Maybe I never looked far enough into it to know exactly what it meant. It just seemed funny to me at the time.

I like things to be thoroughly heated to kill off any germs, of course. My mom grew up without any refrigeration or anything like that during the Great Depression and WWII. She's 83 now and I'm her primary caretaker, so I tend to do most of the cooking. She still likes to help out even though her eyes are going bad…

But then Trump would call for an investigation to address the missing ice cream, like Queeg with the strawberries in The Caine Mutiny.

I once ate at a diner that had chicken-fried chicken on the menu. What?

Yeah, my mom grew up on a farm and she cooks pork until it's dry and leathery to make sure there aren't parasites alive in it.

My other choice was "Heinz Baked Beans", but "Squeeze Box" seemed like a better option. More people likely know that one.

["Squeeze Box" starts playing]

My first car was a 1987 Golf and it was great. But I'm also 6'4", and I tried driving a 1988 Golf for nostalgic reasons last year. I have no idea how I used to fit in there.

I lived in the Minneapolis-St. Paul area in Minnesota during that time and high school kids were all lowering their import cars and adding wide rims with low-profile tires. The thing about Minnesota is that it gets cold in the winter, causing frost in the ground that makes the roads heave up and all kinds of potholes…