"Dear Agent Scully: Did not appreciate your lawyer's tone."

I think they would shoot the regular Jesus if He appeared to them today. Well, maybe not the blue-eyed, blond Jesus.

That guy had a bad temper, so it wasn't difficult to provoke the fiery fury of Guy Fieri's Ferrari guy wire guy.

Obviously a radioactive lamb. (Uncle) Ben Franklin was somehow involved, too.

Last seen driving a Range Rover or McLaren F1.

Use of excessive force was authorized.

Grrrdon Smmmner was even more unwieldy.

I wonder how he'll celebrate. Oh, right. "Birthday?"

I have my moments.

I watched something about that and think someone offered to revive Washington's corpse by draining the blood and infusing it with lamb's blood, but his family declined. I could have it all wrong. Nope, that actually happened.

This sponsored message brought to you by Campbell's. Just go home and have soup!

Tell me why.

My friend was telling me about a time he got into a discussion with his coworker because the coworker was trying to argue that he could stick to a budget and balance a checkbook, and the government should be able to do the same thing. My friend was trying to tell the guy it's not even remotely the same thing but…

It's in Thigh-land.

That wouldn't have been my first Gauss.

The Mall of Emerica? No. they're doing fine.

Exit light -

Have you ever been in a Turkish prison?

And another guy who would transport it across bodies of water. Guy Fieri's Ferrari ferry guy.

Lamborghini? And not a Guy Ferrari?