I'm going to use a similar tactic next time I get pulled over by a cop. When the officer asks me why I was speeding I'm going to say, "because the car was going fast".

I hope someone saved that pumpkin mask. It's a national treasure.

I'm shocked, SHOCKED. Well, not that shocked.

I met Steve Rannazzisi once. True Story.

Sometimes I feel like she's doing an Andy Kaufman style bit.

Now if somebody would please apologize for Linkin Park

Isn't this what a publisher does?

Did anybody else think Dick Van Dyke and Mary Tyler Moore were married?

Her and Patrick Schwarzenegger used to do some pretty hardcore hand holding.

I can't imagine it would be worth going back to jail for.

Notice how these ads don't show you what the inside of an actual KFC restaurant looks like?

She's his "physician"? What exactly does that entail?

Nothing says "poser" quite like a Gyneth Paltrow handbag.

The names are so similar it's hard to tell who's suing who.

That show went way downhill after Gabrielle cut her hair short.

This is insane? You know what's insane? That the actor is named Wesley
Snipes! If you were shown a picture of him and a picture of me, and were
asked "who should be named Wesley Snipes", you'd pick the pale
Englishman every time! Every time

Still waiting on Cell.

I hope they keep the quizzes.

How glad is he the Cosby story broke on the same day?

The best kind of Darby