https://www.theonion.com/william-safire-orders-two-whoppers-junior-1819565735

A common misconception. He is of the Baden-Württemberg Gambolputty de von…

Yes, now you must bathe 7 times in the Jordan River in Utah in order to cleanse yourself from the sin.

No. I’m saying It’s About Madamn Time.™

Audiences immediately turned on Claire Bear for being a manic pixie dream girl-esque fantasy who didn’t fit into a show where people get stabbed on the line and someone drives a car into a living room.

Set your expectations super low for Argylle. There’s fun to be had, but expect nothing.

“They see me Brolin, they hatin’.”

Now I need to see the original Captain Explosion trilogy..

I hear this complaint all the time, but the fact is that studios DO turn out original genre films - but the people who love to complain don’t appreciate or support them. Just in 2023 we had Poor Things, The Creator, 65, Landscape With Invisible Hand, Aporia, Asteroid City, Foe, Knock at the Cabin, and others of…

Remember when I said I’d notify you last?

You’re 100% right...thank you for your time.

No, these days any little change in anything (in the real world) has to have an elaborate explanation in the film because we’re giant babies.  

I refuse to use my imagination! Just replace him with the digital Peter Cushing.

“Burning to death feels good in a place like this.”

Troy and Abed in a mooo-vie!

Hey, it’s called copaganda for a reason.

It’s an autonomous unit for mid-mall snacking. 

This. It doesn’t matter whether they catch the right person. All that matters is they can report another case closed, so their statistics look good.

This is like casting Willem Dafoe as Santa Claus