To follow suit, the Mets announced it is Bill Buckner Day, a day to sit back, relax, and celebrate the balls between our legs.

Cardinals fans want you to know they’d never do that to one of their own. Then they’d probably talk about how Alou got pretty uppity about the whole thing.

A team of neurologists and surgeons told my wife’s parents that her head injuries from a car wreck were so severe she would never be able to look after herself again, never be able to walk more than a few paces.

Also not a good look: saying shit like “sob like a woman.”

Sources say the officers who bungled the investigation were motivated to do the right thing after watching Bruce Almighty on DVD and being stirred by the wise, compassionate portrayal of God by Samuel L. Jackson.

From the news article:

Or they could you know, just remove the trip and bludgeon hazards for a fraction of the cost.

“just in case you don’t read our sign about not running on the pool deck, we’ve ringed it with punji sticks to illustrate how serious we are”

It’s called “testing for cocaine”

You can’t /endthread your own comment. that’s as bad as liking your own facebook post.

Yes, they can accelerate hard, but no Odyssey driver would ever do that, or even want to do that given that this is what happens when the accelerator pedal is floored:

Being a sane conservative is pretty difficult at this point actually, because of how loaded the term “conservative” is nowadays. I’m conservative in that I believe in personal responsibility, fiscal responsibility, and minimal government intrusion. I’m not religious or against any group of people. I’m fine with…

“I, I’m afraid you’ll — you’re saying you arrested a UFC fighter but did not arrest television’s Mr. Rogers of ‘Mr. Rogers’ Neighborhood’? Explain that to me because I’m not sure I understand. I’m troubled by this. You say it’s a big deal? Wasn’t Mr. Rogers a big deal? I’m....what’s the word for when you’re confused?”

May he ride eternal, shiny and chrome.

I tell ya...

So many good beers from Belgium, and the world embraces Stella....

This took me entirely too long to make.

Common amoxicillin side effects may include:

That’s a giant bottle of amoxicillin. #6yearsofpharmacyschool

Spagnuolo later apologized if anyone was offended but his personal animosity toward fat people was because his father had spent years of his life fighting the morbidly obese.

He looks like Eminem if Eminem was stunt-casted in a Scorsese film as a 55-year old.