Check out the “Maury” sketch. Probably the best bit of the night.

I honestly don’t know how any human actually manages to speak in her presence. Between the eyes and the body, I would collapse.

This is shaping up to be a pretty solid movie. 

Ditto Emma Watson.

The Cis Army

What about her dick?

Camera Repairman: “Don’t look at Cillian Murphy’s dick, that would be inappropriate, just look at his eyes. Oh shit, his eyes are so intense! Back to the junk!”

They're destined to meet like the Highlander

She’s the secret great-granddaughter of Sherlock and Irene Adler?

I’d hope they’d be horrified Jews created ghettos to imprison folks they consider less than.

This is distracting from the real issue, which is that according to a credible rumour I’ve heard, Moriarty is the descendant of Sherlock Holmes’ adversary and is continuing the work of his criminal empire.

You never see Hayden Panettiere and Florence Pugh in the same place at the same time. 

So Kelly talks shit, and Moriarty’s the one who has to leave, because Kelly is basically a real life Stormfront (in that Kelly doesn’t have “fans” so much as she has “an army”) that will make social media unbearable for Moriarty.

I would have liked to see what he would do with Watchmen. I also feel like he would have had a very interesting take on Superman as well. If he was around today I could see him actually taking a crack at the superhero genre.

I know it is tempting to accuse Megyn Kelly (that’s “Megyn” spelled with a “y” because of course it is) of having surgeries that alter her natural appearance. I would like to point out, however, that nothing was ever natural about Megyn-with-a-“y” as she emerged fully formed from a vat labeled “conservative blonde…

Probably Watchmen.

The Incal.

i recall christina aguilera naming her tune ‘drrty,’ or however one spells it, specifically to avoid this problem.

Huh, you know I could swear there’s a movie where he met Private Joker before.

Where did she find the fountain of youth?