I believe George Washington was more qualified to be President than Hillary Clinton. That is my opinion.

George Washington lost most of the battles he fought against the British, but he won the war.

You know who else were freelancers? The citizen soldiers who formed ad hoc militias to defeat King George’s redcoats. America owes her existence to those freelancers.  Freelancing is patriotic.

Those schoolkids were trembling with joyous anticipation of the Washington’s Birthday holiday tomorrow.

Don’t call it Presidents’ Day. The official name of the holiday is Washington’s Birthday and it’s disrespectful to use a name that associates George Washington with the current occupant of the White House or in any other way diminishes the prestige of George Washington.

Don’t call it Presidents’ Day. The official name of the holiday is Washington’s Birthday and it’s disrespectful to…

George Washington never worried about germs and the Constitution was penned by filthy-handed people with unwashed buttocks. People today won’t even touch it without rubber gloves.

George Washington was a great friend to Native Americans.

Physical fitness is what enabled the patriot army led by George Washington to defeat King George’s redcoats. Exercise is patriotic.

George Washington didn’t know he had DNA.

The frigid winter of 1777 was a brutal test for the men of the Patriot army encamped in Valley Forge, but George Washington’s leadership kept the army together.

George Washington had to defeat the world’s strongest military to get the level of hype that AOC is getting. She hasn’t earned it, and it’s unfair to George Washington.

What about George Washington? Shouldn’t we be teaching kids about him before the Bible?

George Washington travelled on horses. Aircraft are a relatively recent invention.

“Job training.”

Splinter loves AOC more than George Washington.  That’s not my idea of patriotism.

George Washington was a government worker, so you’re wrong.

Nobody ever wondered whether George Washington was a traitor.  His patriotism was beyond question.

Beto is more Poochie the Dog than George Washington.

“Pick your favorite George Washington lie” would be the most boring game ever, because George Washington never told any lies.

Gillibrand was selected to take over Hillary’s Senate seat because she was the closest thing the Democratic Party could find to a clone of Hillary. George Washington was not a clone of anybody. He was a true original. That’s what voters want, not a clone of Hillary Clinton. They want a clone of George Washington.