My favorite Carlin quote fits really well with immigration these days. Paraphrasing.

I’ve been to Georgia.  Georgia is not better than this.  

I look forward to sharing a nod with you at Sandals!

And you can’t put a price on that! 

Also Presidents love to get the popular vote b/c they can move forward with their agenda with a ‘mandate from the people.’

Mom doesn’t deserve that though! 

Aww, find that critter some shade! 

Snore Patrol’s comment above is also a contender!

It’s that stupid fucking turtle face.  

Coolidge burn!

This is very funny

Hey, what’s that big lake?

It’s a salad of eggs.

I fully agree. How many things are we going to have to subscribe too? I like Jim. He’s standup is fine and I’d watch him on Netflix but I’m not creating yet another god damned user name and password somewhere else.

Thanks for the idea. Appreciate the response.

I need to say that this piece has me really freaked out right now. My sister actually married her college professor(grad school) and I’ve got to say that from the moment they met I’ve never been comfortable with it. The age difference was only 8 years which was OK but I could never totally look past the power…

He’s a legend for Black Jeopardy alone!

I think all of us teenage boys were so attracted to Alicia Silverstone that for that reason alone they thought they could get away with it.

Don’t you wish you saved mom the hassle?

I’ve peed in your sink. Sorry.