autotune version in 3..2..1..

George W.! Stop posting pictures of your Dick!

Or Mrs. Thorsdson told a pregnant Mrs. Busath about the name she'd always wanted to give a daughter, and Mrs. Busath snatched away her dream.

I think you mean "Absorbs"

Objectified.

http://www.collegehumor.com/video/5806921/…

I suppose in today's times, more and more criminals will have selfies and other portraits that humanize them rather than the orange jump-suited perp walk or blurry surveillance images taken during a crime that we are used to.

CAN I COME OVER!?

I feel like a fraud because instead of being insulted by the video, it just made me wish I could have a frozen hot chocolate.

I would like someone to make a parody of Robin Thicke's Blurred Lines video with pregnant women walking by these men while the men sing to them "Good Girl, I know you want it, We're gonna make you keep it."

Obvious pandering to the fish vote

Mom?

I've been asking my husband to get a NO PENICILLIN tattoo for a few years. But then again, I'm totally paranoid that something will happen and either I won't be there, or I'll panic and not remember, and he'll die from a simple stupid injection.

I think everyone is missing the bigger lead: People are paying attention to a Comptroller election. It's insanity.

No, it's just your 2nd annual 29th birthday

Dear Bride,

Mine would be "She's not cute, she's just weird"

It's a trick! They just want a better angle to protect our vaginas.

I always envisioned Alma Coin as more of a Linda Hunt a la If Looks Could Kill

I believe the headline should read: "Your imaginary boyfriend, Chris O'Dowd, chomps on fly, still totally kissable."