Analog dick pics! OMG

My wife once got an actual photograph of some guy’s boner slid under the apartment door. She and her roommate figured it was the creepy morning doorman of their building. She kept it because it was so comically large. Years later, I was trying to find a pen and I stumbled across it and she told me the story. This was…

Addiction and abuse are a reality of poverty. People who are happy and healthy are not likely to become addicts or hurt their loved ones. People who are deprived of resources have to try a lot harder to be happy and healthy. It’s not an attempt to vilify people in poverty, it’s expressing discontent with a system that…

spanked their 14-year-old daughter with a hockey stick and a jump rope

I actually disagree with those examples, even if your broader point is valid. Kanye basically called her a hoe, so her doing “porn-star” sex acts like titty-fucking or sucking his dick is still him in power because “that’s what hoes do”. Putting a finger in an asshole is about showing comfort and vulnerability, so…

Calm down there, Satan.

Well, that’s just great. You hear that, Rex? Bears. Now you’re putting the whole organization in jeopardy.

Happy for you, Coach Smith. Congrats from a once-upon-a-time 10 year old tomboy who dreamed of becoming the NFL’s first female kicker. You will inspire so many little girls.

I imagine smug from Pittsburgh has french fries in it

I’m out of order?! You’re out of order, this whole goddamn court is out of order!!!

New personal hero: The guy who offered Betty Friedan bread sticks. I hope he didn’t do it sarcastically.

And Emma Thompson:

from Emma Watson, i am about to cry again.

This week hurts.

If there is a woman alive who has not had this experience, I’d like to meet her, because she is a rare, rare creature. I’m so grateful to you for sharing your story and elaborating on the complexity of consent. So many people want to make it a black-and-white, yes-or-no issue, and the more people who stand up and say…

The cast of Absolutely Fabulous was banned from drinking after the partying got “out of control.”

It looks like he’s in the process of forming a Mickey Rourke tribute band.

I hate Sean penn’s stupid fucking face.