Very unfair.

I have a medical condition!

Actually, I don't think you can.

Okay, cool.

I've always kind of liked Clooney, but now I don't anymore.

The music that plays at that moment was great too.

Thank you.

Did Not Disappoint

Don't have kids.

This fucking country.

http://i.onionstatic.com/av…

The still embedded in the review looks supremely goofy and fake, and man I can't wait to see this movie. I really loved both Flying Daggers and Hero on a purely visual level (I recently watched Hero on Netflix, but the only subtitles available were the CC, and that annoyed me, so I just watched it without subtitles…

I was trying to be nice, but every time I see one of these stupid recaps all I ever think is, "Nobody wins a monkey shit fight."

Twitter is stupid.

Horror movies were never my thing, but I remember spending a lot of time as a kid, driven by morbid curiosity, flipping through Fangoria at the bookstore in the mall. (Not B. Dalton — What was the other one, back in the day?)

My bad?

I'll admit, my initial take on headlines like this is generally, "This seems kind of silly and more than a little dubious," but you kids . . . you kids are fucking adorable.

The fact that we elected Donald Trump seems to confirm that we are a country full of sub-literate morons . . . as do most of these (Jesus Christ) tweets.

Nothing about this reply surprises me.

The only thing I really took away from this comment is that I'm not sure if you understand how metaphors work.