"You have a large bust? A larger size makes it look like you're wearing a parachute, just to cover the breasts. Too tight and people call you promiscuous."
THANK YOU. And the muscular thighs!! No cure for this. But I have to give a shout-out to eShakti for making dresses that you can adjust measurements on for a…

This is so fucking beautiful. I hated this movie too. I was actually suicidally depressed when it came out (not because of it, mere coincidence), and was offended by it, which is a little weird.... The once twice three times a lady funeral scene will always have a special place in my heart tho.
P.S. I now have to watch…

Yes! The metacarpals!! I learned enough in a single semester high school anatomy class to call foul on that one. Sometimes I'd be all, How do the writers know all this or have time to look it all up! ....Oh, they're just saying random words. Nevermind.

Just revisited this. Looking at the date (January 5), I realize that your post was actually one of my favorite birthday presents of 2013. Ha!

Thank you for presenting the possibility of cognitive dissonance here. We need more of that. Because if you're not a victim of it, you're not really fully thinking this issue through, in my opinion.

Thanks for the follow-up; I was really scared for a minute there. There's too much dichotomy going on here! I see both sides and it hurts!!

...You guys are adorable.

Just wanted to point out that Patton Oswalt later changed his views in this long letter: http://www.pattonoswalt.com/index.cfm?page… Skip down to Part 3: Rape Jokes.

I had one who wouldn't give me the second shot of the HPV vaccine because I wasn't currently on my period. I asked why it mattered, and they said because I could be pregnant. They said if I were on birth control, it would be okay, and asked it I was. I said no, but I hadn't had sex in months. They wouldn't accept…

I got an STD after being sort of date raped (he wasn't my date), and had to go to a doctor, so I went to one a friend recommended. She told me I needed to use condoms. I didn't want to tell her what exactly had happened, so I simply said that I did. She literally scoffed and said, "Huh, obviously not..." Yay, thanks,…

STEVE ZAHHHHHN!! Oh man, how have I not seen this movie? I knew the clip was going to be good, but.... I think I may have just woken up my neighbors with my "HAAA!!" Tears. Thank you.

In October, I happened to be stuck in the back seat of a car that was driving across Kentucky while attempting to listen to football on a Sunday. We stopped at a gas station, and I craved beer, but there was nothing. Next gas station, BEER! But it was literally chained up. Because of JESUS. The three women gossiping…

When I was in high school, there was this guy who was very much in the nerd clique. His friends were kind of dickheads, but I could tell he was a total sweetheart and was better than those chauvinists, so I befriended him and invited him to join me and the rest of the artsy weirdos in our building. He was soon one of…

Hillary, I don't know who you are or where you came from, but you are amazing. I just found a pile of your articles, and you are just fantastic. Have you been here all along?? I can't believe that. You must be newish. Either way, I am SO GLAD you are here. I will be reading ALL of your stuff.

Jack the Giant Slayer was one of the worst things ever. Ugh. As if I needed another fantastic example of how CGI is ruining movies. AS IF, I SAY. When I realized he was Marcus, it really bummed me out. Speaking of bumming, it turns out there is a lot of hilarious fanfic about his and Ewan McGregor's characters. My…

I find this surprising. I love the shibas I have walked. I think the key is, you NEED to invest time in loving and TRAINING them, because they are pretty intelligent. They also often have separation anxiety, hyperactivity, and other such issues that small smart loving dogs can have. They ain't no Malteses (who can…

And Will, that last paragraph was perfect. Thank you.

I'm VERY serious about tipping, but even I agree on the $1 for a bottle of beer thing.
That being said, I have to try to tell everyone: When you order food, the delivery fee almost NEVER goes to the driver/biker. It usually goes to the website or the restaurant (which is stupid and unfair). I have biked food to people…

A couple years ago, the internet lied to me about when the last train back to the Chicago from the suburbs was, and I got stranded. The manager of the bar and grill I was at offered to drive me to the still operating train station nearby after the bar closed. Instead, he called a cab and took me to a motel. NOPE. I…

UPDATE: On my last 2 plane trips (landed 2 hours ago), I planned and ate very very carefully in the 24 hours before flying, and it worked: no gas! I just had to avoid, you know, most foods. But I was more comfortable and the people around me were probably a little happier too. Just do some googling and eat…