And in 2 years he’ll fall for her sister.

Sounds like it was this guy

ACT LIKE YOU’VE BEEN THERE BEFORE, BIRD

In related news, Jake from State Farm just signed with Prudential for less money in order to escape that toxic work environment.

There’s only one Winslow worth trading up for, and he’s all about Justice with a C:

I’m impressed. The last time I caught something in Cleveland it required three rounds of antibiotics.

‘we have to learn to live with less’

Shut up

I KNEW IT

IBM’s computer thinks in chocolate and vanilla. Sometimes what it knows is chocolate, sometimes it’s vanilla, sometimes it’s a swirl. Sometimes, though, the swirl melts; then you have to decide if there was more chocolate or more vanilla in that puddle. IBM just hired a fat kid that can tell the difference.

Hey, don’t worry, Lebron. That’s not what HGH stands for. You’ll be fine.

As I understand it, length is more important than girth when filling such a hole.

I bet he wishes he didn't hit that first drive so baddeley.

Baltimore took this more seriously than domestic violence

Make fun all you want, but Peter Gammons is one of the world's busiest and foremost acronymologists. While we blather on and on, Gammons can fit 140 words into 140 characters.

wish a dingo ate your comment

Kettle Chips over Salt and Vinegar? Who are you monsters?

I ain't your buddy, pal!

Images have surfaced of the thrower.