“These are the strongest vials out there. Dab” And then he dabbed.

If you ever saw someone get nailed by a skater at 30 mph because they were stepping on a sidewalk from the park to cross the street, then you’d know that cop is doing his fucking job. I love skating, but fuck doing it in a public area where you can fucking kill someone. If you want to blast downhill, then you gotta…

Dana White is to UFC press conferences what Puff Daddy was to Biggie videos.

holy shit! You can buy dogs that bite Lena Dunham? Sign me up.

Ironically, based on today’s gold prices, if David Griffin weighs 200 pounds, that would mean he’s worth $3,917,088 in gold, right around the league average for a GM.

It’s going to be really hard to make LeBron GM jokes when this team comes up short (possibly shorter) again next season.

Haha, yeah it was stupid hard in the original.

I actually quite playing San Andreas because of that mission. Quit it entirely.

oh my god. just hook this kinja right up to my veins

The missing “t” in Scot’s name is because he burned it on Kap’s lawn.

It really is throwing away a vote. Jill Stein wasn’t even a fucking serious candidate. Everything about her run showed that she was only doing it for attention and demonstration. She had no intention of ever running a country or even vaguely providing the public with the impression that maybe she was capable of doing…

A baby bird in the nest that opens its brightly-colored mouth and makes a peep sound will be fed by its parents. It will continue doing this until it is a fully grown bird. Meanwhile, a baby bird that does not do this will starve to death.

The people who vote for Trump are people who don’t think like a normal person. They’re not happy with their lives and instead of taking accountability for their own position in life, or at least sucking it up and making the best of it like the rest of us, they’re angry and bitter and want to blame somebody for it.

He’s never been IN the black either.

Even if they were only $150, the fact that they made these “All sales final, no returns or exchanges” on a shoe that you can only buy online and has no previous product to even tangentially compare sizes with is the most underrated fuckboy move of this entire fuckboy enterprise.

Along with the betting, it’s expected that millions of workers will allocate lots of on-the-job time and resources toward making their NCAA picks, building brackets and then tracking games on TV or online.

Ok, this seems to be the part people like you don’t seem to understand and I don’t get the holdup. So let’s spell it out somewhere that I can copy/paste elsewhere as needed... A “right to free speech” is NOT THE SAME THING as a “right to a platform from which to share your opinions”.

Bert and Ernie are muppets, not Muppets. Any puppet that came out of Jim Henson’s workshop is a muppet, but only those appearing on the Muppet Show are proper noun Muppets. It’s not a hard distinction, folks.

It’s kind of a perfect parallel. He’s got the brother who’s undeniably worse yet somehow wins more.