All those in favor of a unified Germany take one goose step forward! (sorry)

That has been dormant in my brain for many, many years. You, sir or ma'am, are History's Greatest Monster for waking this memory up.

I dated a lovely Glaswegian (actually from Cumbernauld, a horribly failed "new town" near there). She was my first girlfriend and a real sweetie. When she talked to her dad, I didn't understand anything they said, but I loved to hear her say things like "you're ma wee luv". I remember I asked her dad in the '80s why…

Needle scratch plus dog putting paws over his eyes. Caucasian ska music was the cue for seriousness-to-wackiness there for a while.

He lives in Florida, and has bowled a perfect game.

When I was in the Oakland choir, I heard a guy sing Change is gonna come, at this church in East Oakland. They couldn't get the sound to work at all, so finally the singer gave up and got in the audience, walking around and singing. One of the best performances I've heard - when I'm 90 and drooling in my wheelchair,…

Marvin Gaye would put a political manifesto to a sex beat. And make it sound sexy.

Why Can't We Live Together is an amazing song. Seriously, take three minutes out of your life and listen to this song.

But this life hack changed the way I felt about everything! There should be a few rules we follow. I'll start with one: Any link with "life hack" in the title = immediate unfriend. There are also those cooking ones with the quick hands dicing onions or something.

You mean the guy who posted the Bernie Sanders meme "Huge Bernie Rally in California, Media pays no Attention", which ended up being a May Day parade in Havana?

Regurgitay-shon.

I thought that was a fez.

Are you (Yahoo) serious?

He really likes front wheel drive Oldsmobiles.

8 pm, Diners, Drive-ins and dives: a troll figurine comes to life and roams the countryside eating garbage.

"The policeman isn't there to create disorder; the policeman is there to preserve disorder." - Da Mayor

I took some gun training a couple of years ago that was led by this very serious, squared-away ex-Marine drill instructor at an indoor range. The second day, we had an option to shoot some famous guns - a 1911 Colt, Walther PPK, .38 Special, .357 Magnum and finally the .44 Magnum. When I got to the .44, the sheer…

I take the second part of your dogma there, but take it in a different way: If you are taking your political cues from musicians, artists, and filmmakers, you don't know very many of them.

We're going to be wishing Merry Christmas on taco bowls from now on.

I'm taking you off the joke detail. You're in too deep.