Relevant: I once saw Mason Plumlee drop spinach dip all over his sweatpants at a bar in Portland.

She’s amazing. MOST of her speech was amazing, but...

This shit is bananas.

Lawyer: Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, we’ve all heard the expression, “Shoot or get off the pot.”

[gif deleted because i am an idiot trash person]

Somewhere, Carl Everett is smiling, believing he’s found a kindred spirit in the sports world. However, Irving does believe that dinosaurs are real, having played against Chris Bosh.

You should see what happened to his brother, Michael.

Dime Bags Two For One

This guy sounds like he’s uttered the phrase “but it’s not a pyramid scheme” to all of his friends multiple times.

Me and Adrian Peterson would have been dynamic.

Yeah, and if you don’t like what they write you can just get them expelled.

Manti Teo is dating Utah’s sixth man?

Clint Eastwood would call that a hate crime.

Peyton Manning: A head for business, a head for policy, a head for compassion and a head for America. Peyton Manning: Four Heads.

CHRIS BOSH WANTS TO FEEL THE HEAT WITH SOMEBODY

What’s in the revised script? WHAT’S IN THE REVISED SCRIPT?!

I can think of another new symbol that more accurately gauges fan interest

As for Mayweather’s assertion that only God can judge him, people who have read the letter his son wrote, in which he details the ways in which Mayweather beat his mother, may disagree.

Well of course God can judge him. After all, the big guy handed down the very first decision using the 10-point must system.

It’s Baylor, so it could have been much worse.