I wonder how Mike Trout feels about this article.

Fucking vegans. As a follower of the paleo diet, I masturbate religiously with lard from free-range pigs. Now every time I see the GEICO pig, I get extremely aroused. Totally worth it. You are what you masturbate with. Once the lard leaves the pig, it's really slippery so I can't steer with it.

And the Heat cut that fucking lead down to 7 in the 3rd Quarter. Insane game. Belinelli brought it up to 10 and rescued the team.

OH GOD. Me too. I was fucking terrified.

Don't worry. James Dolan doesn't know either.

Fisher will wear a bolo tie over his tanktop. Those guns ain't concealed-carry.

Shut the fuck up. Stop arguing. Give the Native Americans what they want. There's really no argument here. The bullshit white people semantic games just don't work. And to the chagrin of a lot of white people, these games just don't matter any more. Listen to the Native Americans and give them what they want. Treat…

What does Mark 'Ohhh but think of the PC fascists!!!' Cuban have to do with all this?

But I thought we could have a happy ending!

No, I'm keeping it as a penalty for you gushing your underwear to see an ugly guy defile a hot chick.

Ah, you're bisexual. And you have a thing for the overweight.

You're the exception that proves the rule. P.S: I bet your best gal pals think of you as being shallow and superficial.

That's a good point. I guess I need to stick to organizations and professionals who don't work in humanities subjects or try to be activists?

Of course you would. You're a woman. Women have a thing for ugly guys who make them laugh. You would never ever watch a movie with the fat chick from Bridesmaids getting it on with Ryan Gosling though.

This is really true! I found a lot of cool stuff on Twitter. But after a while, the constant humanities-jargon laden barrage of outrage over trivial shit really annoyed me. The activists were the worst. It got tiring having to sift through their hourly upset and find what I was looking for. There was also a lot of…

He has a face for a shitty, glib sitcom where he plays the cool-guy (actually douchebag) boyfriend to a neurotic, needy, blonde girl who like, just can't get her shit in order!! And who has a black best friend who makes jokes about (what else?) being black, and they get coffee in a restaurant run by a quirky Latino…

Pure athleticism makes for awesome visual content. It's interesting that people are fixated on Russell Westbrook's dunk on Kawhi Leonard from last night even though the Spurs came back from that and roundly thrashed OKC. Why? Because that dunk looks great.

Do you mind sharing what websites you like to check out online? I've found a couple halfway decent sites like the New Yorker or Felix Salmon's site. But I'm always looking for better sources of good writing and intelligent analysis on a wide range of stuff. I've found that the Brookings Institution has some really…

Yeah, me too. Diaw is truly awesome and underrated.

As a polyamorous, bisexual, feminist, sexually submissive genderqueer who lives as a full-time pony slave to my master, I'm not okay with fat-shaming.