If only we had listened to Bono! Brangelina could have been saved! But he’s just such a turd.

That doesn’t bring any closure, it just raises more questions. “Dora’s cousin who rescues baby animals...but sexy.” Was the theme of the night Rule #34?

Fun Fact: Trump approached Warhol to do some portraits for his hotel, but Warhol just brushed him off because Trump was notorious for commissioning art and not paying in full.

Bowie didn’t know Warhol. They met a few times. Most famously, when Bowie first came to America. Bowie played “Andy Warhol” Warhol got offended at the line “Looks a scream” and left. His wranglers brought him back, he took Bowie’s picture and complimented his shoes. But I don’t think that gave him any insight.

Leaving little letters for Truman Capote.

To be fair Warhol did mumble.

There’s a lot of paraphrasing in those passages. Dirty Harry is considered a classic film and Speed was one of the biggest films of the early 90's. I don’t see why it’s odd that one of the parents would be familiar with them. Because their wealthy?

I thought, whoever wrote the note, was trying to allude to something like the SLA. The group that kidnapped Patty Hearst in the 70's. I think it’s more likely that a middle aged parent is familiar with them than a 10 year old.

Maybe she’s been cast in a remake of Cool Runnings.

It really is. I really like Kane, the Crocs are ridiculous, but he’s one of those designers who has their tongue planted firmly in their cheek. I believe Alicia Keys was wearing a Christopher Kane sweater on The Voice tonight.

Then you’ll love Kane’s F/W 2016-17 Collection inspired by Big and Little Edie and binge watching Hoarders.

I’m not joking and some of the pieces are really pretty. I would feel S-T-A-U-N-C-H in that cardigan.

This is like Canada’s version of a serial killer. If she were American, they would find a freezer stuffed with human torsos in her garage.

Were there jazz hands involved? I feel like that was the perfect moment to break out the jazz hands.

Calling a kid a pedophile and saying a someone is dressed like a “frumpy old lady” doesn’t seem bad to you?

Because it was obviously Paul Verhoeven and Joe Eszterhas’s intent.

Next you’ll tell me that you didn’t know Sorority Babes in the Slimeball Bowl-O-Rama was a not so thinly veiled critique of American universities prioritizing athletics over academics.

Showgirls should be taught in universities. It’s like a Marxist parable about life in Capitalist society. Spoiler alert: We’re all whores, darlin’.

I’m surprised that the TRL stunt just warranted a paragraph. It was so weird.

Mariah wasn’t scheduled to be on TRL that day, she just showed up in an oversized, airbrushed t-shirt passing out ice cream. At first the audience think it’s some planned surprise, then it slowly dawns on them that something is very wrong and…

It was!

It’s “tiger blood” I’m sorry, but it looks like you’ll have to repeat the year 2011.