@jgh: And LIKE that, he is dead to me. It's like when it became clear that Colin Farrell would hump a ham sandwich.

This is my new very favorite picture of all time.

WHY HAVE I NEVER SEEN JAMES SPADER AT THE GROVE???

This is not like the dad giving his daughter a Brazilian on Tyra. These are Academy Award nominees doing their job.

@Lymed: Yeah, a different universe that is awesome.

In other news, this morning a group of cardinals gathered in the Vatican to announce that the pope is indeed Catholic.

@bananastand: I had the same situation with my sister. It took me way too long to find her. Luckily she has gigantic breasts, so all it took was one bra thread and I knew she would, er, expose herself...

@Vivien Smith-Smythe-Smith: Ha, my boyfriend must never discover my Jezebel alter ego. If only because then he will know what I really do all day and he'll stop bringing me cookies to make up for my "hard" days.

No, no, no Elmer, he never ran shit by me first. I swear.

@CrossWord: WAIT, you guys LIVE together??? Do you just type awesomeness at each other on the couch? That's what I would do if I lived with a Jez commenter. But since I live alone, I just type awesomeness at myself. And then eat cheese and cupcakes.

I can't keep a journal to save my life. And I consider myself to be a writer. Every time I try, I write things like "today I had a Pop Tart" and then I turn on Rock of Love.

@rocknrollunicorn: Orthopedic shoes may have been involved.

@BabyJane: Shady Pines represents.

@Trixie from Toronto: That's what I was thinking. Some people (Ashleeeee—I'm lookin' at you) seem to be pregnant for years. Others you barely hear about and then bam—here comes baby.

It is the comments above me that make me love Jezebel with all of my heart and soul.

I was certain she was Lily Allen before the jump.

Really Madden? Because I always thought Nicole knew the Truth About Diamonds.

OK, I admit it. I hijacked the truck! I just love me some gap boy shorts and well-fitting bras.

I am actually speechless. This is wrong on more levels than I knew existed.

@nolongerinacubiclestillawhore: Remind me to tell you about my SECOND encounter with our boyfriend this weekend!