I like his style, here is me winning a gold in Rio.

About a day after masturbating is no longer a fun way to pass the time.

this is the only appropriate response.

Always masturbation truthers

I’m 38 and I give myself hand jobs nearly every day.

Fourteen year olds giggled. Anyone older than that is asking, “Who the hell still gives hand jobs?”

I still feel bad about having a fantasy basketball team in college called Vin & Tonic.

I tried watching the HR Derby. I really did. But I couldn’t get past Chris Berman ruining everything with his shtick. I had to turn it off. Can he please be put out to pasture already?

The NFL franchise comparison isn’t particularly apt (this is more like buying the whole NFL), but Forbes claims that, as of last year, the Cowboys were worth $4b, meaning that, to buy them away from Jerry, you’d have to pay a sizable premium.

How dare you, sir. Baseball trade rumors are one of the three things that still bring a little joy to my otherwise mundane existence.

In happier news, Draymond’s foot is pregnant with Steven Adams’ baby.

If you don't know, now you know, I guess.

But, what about that guy in the middle with the upper body that looks as though it has been bbq’d? Shouldn’t he be seeking medical attention, not looking to roast his nuts and wiener, too?

So ... many ... testicles

Nope. Sorry. You do not punish players who exploited a terrible bug you let slip through. You fix the bug as fast as possible, but you DO NOT punish players for taking advantage of your bad QA.

Shit, man! This isn't any big deal! I have the same diet/regimen, except with words like "Pop Tarts", "donuts", "double cheeseburgers" and "fried chicken" substituted for all those other ones. Oh, and without those 'workouts' and 'training' things. That shit just gets in the way of eating.

Last night I got swarmed by multiple groups of DZ99 Gear220 guys. They were all rogue level 5. I don’t know if it was multiple groups fighting or working together, but this is ridiculous. After I was instantly killed they just all stayed outside the safe house and I could not leave. I finally thought I could make a…

Yeah, Destiny taught me to be less obsessive in The Division (and all future games, for that matter). As long as my gear is good enough to beat the highest level of content that I want to play, then I’m fine with what I have. I am not try-harding or farming to get the absolute best gear and the best rolls. F that. The…

“you do activities to get shit that makes obtaining new shit a little bit easier. And then that shit makes the next shit a little bit easier to get.”

Can we really consider a light level adjustment and some new gear a “major content update” though? We had a raid each in vanilla and Dark Below, and I was willing to accept House of Wolves as mostly filler before Taken King, but the idea that we haven’t had a single one since King’s Fall is... a bit silly, frankly.…